Back in the van

In the back of the van
Sucking fumes
And wrapped in a blanket
To shield me from
This poorly insulated
Piece of shit
With dreams of a car
That won't go fall apart
And an apartment or a house
That the bank won't foreclose on
I know I contribute value
I can see it in their eyes
So why would they let me die out here like this? Why?

Lay Me Down

Slaying
Sleeping
Slaying
Sleeping

Every little pain, a fear of something bigger
Lighting up the first fires in my mind
And they don't stop until I finally dump the buckets
All over every flame

God, Waves & Saturdays

i've got a headache.
it's taking me a lot today
to get up out my bed.
i've taken the longest ways
 and seven ways to saturday
i cancel the beat in my head.

i take the longest ways.
got seven ways to Saturday,
to go fuck up everything.
the longer i'm waiting
i'm severing something
that is saving me.

i faked the way i felt like love was a moving shelf
a cancer was spreading
and i, used to yesterday, got -- god given -- in the way
of anything deadening for good.
the difference was deafening
i still just can't believe
that damaged, old tongue in cheek
while billfolds are spreading
they look like the dumbest eve
my heart races, quickening
and in my head that blasted beat.

God, if you opened your chemistry set tonight
and used it to make something right
i'd sing to you till the day i died.

As if i wouldn't anyway.
I just hope that you find me here
before i waste away and die.

Dear love,

My name and my face don't matter much anymore
See, I was cost to this horrible accident.
A broken bow; my melody not so sweet anymore.
But in loss, I've gained.

I know your name again, my sweet love.
How the shocking cold of the timberous north does rip through my skin,
So does your name through my mind and my head.
You are the soul I would give love to hold.
You are the best friend I never had.

And as I ramble on in silence
I think of your head
Dashed there on the rocks by the muddy banks
And I think,

'If only love could save.'